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And Now A Word From Tameka…
Published by Runteldat on Friday, October 9, 2009 at 12:00 am.
Only a day after Usher leaked his divorce-promoting track, “Papers,” is soon-to-be-ex wife, Tameka Foster Raymond, running off at the font in the blogosphere.
Tameka wrote a post to Global Grind about celebrities who compromise themselves in order to stay relevant and succeed. Gee, I wonder who she’s talking about.
Here’s some of her rant:
To be or not to be…but at what cost? It’s almost inconceivable the lengths that some artists & entertainers feel obligated to go to keep themselves in the headlines. The prioritization of fan base over God, family, morals, and over just plain ol’ fashioned common sense is an example of that remarkable distance. I think it’s important to understand the premise of letting a character that’s been created for fans drown out who you really are. One easily can become a zombie, while the people who love them waste away looking for the sea salt. It becomes so easy to sell your soul to the entertainment business while creating an illusion of grandeur. Hence, this painfully obvious thirst for relevance that completely overshadows sensibility. Thirsty much?
And on and on she goes. If you dare read the rest of her entry, see below:
When I started in this business over 14 years ago, I was a stylist (fashion) for many well-known artists both upcoming and platinum selling, I never imagined the atmosphere would become this cloudy or eerie. I was trying to define the images of young hopefuls who thought “my way” would set them apart from the masses. Often dorky and clunky, trying to find themselves in defiant color schemes, wrongly combined textures and overworked fashion techniques. Although, consumers see the finished product but are remiss as to what goes into the development. It isn’t always a graceful process. Silly belts, headgear and nervously popped collars often highlighted a level of awkwardness in identity. I’ve watched boys become men and helped boys become men. Yet this identity crisis that hovers over much of the entertainment world is like a crimson cape of insecurity as does this obsession with being “hot” and having “followers.” While fans fixate over the lives of their idols, some celebrities have become slaves to the persona that has been created for them but rarely has anything to do with who they are. Shock value. Publicity stunts. Peddling relationships like a vagabond for a few hundred double clicks on their fans favorite blog sites.
Who are they really?
Some of your favorite artists were born into the industry or should I say “grandfathered” into it and never got the chance to figure it out. Driven by vicarious dreams of demanding managers/labels, artists are a “what” not a “who.” Their “what” is the gross, their “who” is the net. Artists get whatever is left of themselves after the world takes its share. It all reminds me of a scene from the film “The Devils Advocate” where souls were sold for money, class, and status.
The mirrors have definitely become smoky. So much in fact that it makes it hard for one to decipher reality from the facade. Is it Live or Memorex? Even the public should recognize the #FF (fame fanatics) who go to such great lengths to garner attention ranging from publicity ploys, outlandish stage outfits, sex tapes, head shaving, public grand standing, picture leaks and throwing tantrums. From vintage concepts of dating shows in hopes of finding a soul mate (huh? #wheredotheydothatat) to trying to hit Billboard Charts by any means necessary. Surely, the fans know better than to think what flows from “the pen” of any writer embodies the details of another human’s deepest and true desires. Sadly, men singing about love, politics, marriage, children or anything genuine and benevolent equates to album sales flop, mundane chatter and waning popularity. It takes a song about disparaging all the aforementioned just to get accolades and spins on the radio. Unlike a mathematical equation the negative induces the positive. The need to placate fans puts artists at their mercy, leading to maniacal decisions. But I guess desperate times call for desperate measures. I digress….
Nowadays some artists, entertainers, producers and even songwriters are going as far as buying magazine covers and paying photographers to follow them like paparazzi. It’s called #stayingrelevant. I say amass the fortune, help others and bump the fame, but that sentiment is not often shared. The fame, notoriety, popularity and prestige i.e. “the Light” for some is parallel to a drug. So much self-value is encompassed, without it life to them has little worth. Is it life imitating art or art imitating life?
Before the tirades and “smoke and mirror-esque” themes, when music actually made sense, even a mere decade ago, it was something we created memories with, celebrated, made and raised our kids to. It embodied our diverse cultures, experiences, and gave others a peek into our soulful worlds. Yet there are many like Lauryn, Mary J, Common and others that are non-conformists. They have never compromised themselves, their sexuality nor their art, yet they remain timeless. Although standing in “the Light’ has had its costs for all, selling one’s soul for relevance is completely different. It makes one wonder the cost of buying it back. I believe that many of these artists today lack the confidence in self that proves to be true staying power. Where there is absolute talent, no drama, no controversy, no nonsensical angles are needed. Its called: Do what God gave you the talent to do and leave the shenanigans to vaudeville and the games to Milton Bradley.
For those naysayers, I don’t feel the need to run down my list of qualifications or validate myself, or point out the careers I have funded, started, saved, and salvaged. Yet I will say to those that create diversions for relevancy…to stop, save face, don’t listen to those that benefit more from their advice to you, and ask God for suitable guidance. In the meantime don’t feel inclined to do anything that isn’t organic. At this point, I think I may start my own trending topic #betruetoyourself.
Those that actually KNOW me, know how I love a quote that is apropos, so as Dr. Seuss wrote:
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
Tameka that was very well put. So very classy and REAL!!!!
It’s too bad this article is introduced as a “rant.” Well said Tameka! I haven’t heard the song yet, but I imagine the words Usher sings are just as genuine to him as your reactive words to the idea that nothing is sacred or untouchable these days. Now that you’ve made your point – which is soooooo true, I hope you’ll let it rest and let other’s see you for you as you regroup from the split. Let yourself be known for your OWN deeds, rather than words.
What ever Tameka you are still a gold Digga as far as I’m concerned and if you are so genuwine and real that would have come thru a long time ago,
We are forgetting that this is the same woman who left her husband and three kids. What goes around comes around. We as women have to stop placing blame and look within ourselves and fix our problems, She did not have a chance to fix the problem in her last relationship before she jump into another. Do Usher have some blame in this ‘”yes he does” But she did not address why her last relationship failed but she want to address the why this relationship has failed. I think her ex-husband was feeling the same why she is feeling now. So ladies ask yourself this question” Should we feel sorry for her because now she out on her a** or she we tell her the truth ?
How long must the public endure this pain. Ursher I wish you wouldn’t wait until your album drops to sign the papers so Tameka can begin the healing process my god you have children together just stop airing your business.
Is this the same woman who was cheating on her husband with a man way younger than her. How can the pot call the kettle black. Never mind the young children she had with her husband. But now she plays the victim. You both got what you paid for so go on with your lives and don’t bump your heads a second time.
Great article Tameka. I agree 100%. Things look alot clearer when the shoe is on the other foot doesn’t it? What was your view when “Confessions” came out? Did you feel the way that you feel now? NO; because someone else was walking in the shoes that you are now wearing. Remember people, what goes around comes around. There are no exceptions to this rule. You get back what you put out!
Tameka , You Hit The Nail On The Head ! The Whole World Is a Stage & Everybody Plays a Part . Some Parts We Play Are Just a Mirage .
Power To The People , Peace & Blessings !
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OWELL TAMEKA WHAT YOU SAID AND GOSH YOU SAID ALOT BUT ALL I GOT TO SAY IS I KNEW YOU AND USHER WASNT GOING TO LAST LONG IMEAN COME ON NA BE REAL HE A BIG ARTIST AND U ONLY CUT HAIR HE GOT ALOT GOING ON 4HIM AND YOU WAS ONLY A DISTRACTION SORRY BUT IM JUST BEING REAL. IM IN LOVE WITH USHER HE WAS THE FIRST FAMOUS PERSON I EVERD LIKED SORRY TO BRING YOUR DAY DOWN BUT THATS WHO I AM. IM GONE BE REAL WITH YOU. IM NOT FAKE YOU WAS OK BUT HE NEED MORE NOT SAYING THAT YOU NOT GOOD BUT MAN THIS TO MUCH. I LOVE YOU USHER FROM YO NUM1 GURL TL. LOVE YOU. SORRY TAMEKA I GOTTA KEEPIT REAL.
AND I THINK YOU WAS ONLY WITH HIM FOR HIS MONEY, IMEAN COM ON NA YOU GOT WAT 9 KIDS NOW WITH NO SUPPORT SO YEA I THINK THAT. AND YOU JUST CANT PLAY THE VICTIM CAUSE I THINK WAT USHER SAID ABOUT YOU MESSING UP HIS CARS WAS TRUE BECAUSE YOUR MAD HE DUMPD YOU AND NOW U DONT HAVE ANYBODY WITH MONEY TO TAKE CARE OF YOU AND YOUR KIDS YEA HE GONE TAKE CARE OF HIS. AND I THINK HE MIGHT TAKE CARE OF YOURS CAUSE YOU DONT HAVE ANYBODY AND HE MIGHT STILL CARE FOR YOU BUT NAW. SORRY. AND AGAIN YEA CAUSE USHER A NICE PERSON. AND HE WOULDNT WANT NOBODY TO DO THAT TO HIM SO THEN AGAIN YEA .
IGNORANT people, she did not once mention Ushers name. She refereed to artist in general. I feel this was well put and needed to be said. Hence, it’s not kool to disrespect the privacy of a marriage to sell records. It supposed to be for better or worse, in sickness and health till death do us part. He did it to chilli (i.e. confessions) to sell records. Now Tameka. He married her to sell records and is divorcing her to sell records, that’s pitiful. Anyone remember this interview on TRL click the link….. http://musicgossipmore.blogspot.com/2008/05/mtvs-trl-usher-interview.html
Thank You Tanya and Stephanie!!!!!!!!! Tameka you made your bed now lay in it. What about your other kids? Did you consult God then?????? If you are happy with yourself , Why did you go out the country in secret to have cosmetic surgery done and almost died. You make me sick. When you become real then blog. Because the world would have never heard from you or you rant about the music industry if it were not for Usher. Now you want to speak out. ?~*$$ Please!!!!!!!!!
I think their business is theirs alone. Everyones puttin in their two cent and dnt kno whats up.I love the song but at the same time,its not just about what they went thru,that song is about what plenty other people experience in a marriage.Trust im one of em .So its no need to bash and trash Usher cuz their both responsible 4 whats going on.Lastly, the only reason everyones bickering on this is because he a celebrity,,,,I feel ms.Tameka on how this situation is being handled by Usher but hey who are we to judge!!!
She can talk the truth if she want tobut Usher going to do him and he to good for you anyway bitch…..get a life gold digger..
This is a woman who left her three kids and husband!!!!! Are you freakin’ serious? She watched this little boy grow up and knew the man he was going to be and now she wants to criticize him. Give me a break! I am so tired of hearing about this drama it is ridiculous. She is an opportunist! How in the world did everyone know that this marriage wasn’t going to last except for Usher? Everyone knew it…thats why he always found himself defending this relationship. I wish they would sign the papers get on with the divorce and get to the child support and alimony cause we all know thats what her gold diggin ass was up to all along. She popped out two kids too soon and now its over. She had a plan. Just wicked!
What a LOSER she is! A women scourned! I think its fair to say that she should have stayed on the business side of things, business and romance hardly ever work. In addition when you plot on someone else’s man nothing good is to come of it. And Morals, five (or however many, I know its more than two) children and who knows how many men! Sometimes we have to realize who really is the problem, two failed relationships with several children, while she took the time to specify her credentials and experience, she should be evaluating how she played a part in her own drama! From one educated, credentialed, sister to another!
Hello from Russia!
Can I quote a post in your blog with the link to you?
I know that Tameka was hurt when she heard the song “Papers” cause I was very shocked when I heard the song..But I think she is very crazy that’s why Usher named his album “Monster” cause she seems and looks like a true home girl cause she’s scratchiness up his car and doing all kids of crazy things to Usher. But Usher knew what he was getting himself into when he married her…so I blame both of them because they were moving too fast..
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