I’ll bet my SALARY he won’t utter one disrespectful word. Well, maybe…Am I trying to start a beef that’s far from brewing? Hell no. But a couple of previous conversations ignited the start to this post. In retrospect, Em holds court in the “jest” lane.

His banter is sarcastic, but harmless. His motives are to tickle your funny bone, but to embarrass you on every public forum; even when his efforts seem lazy (see “We Made You”)

I did a brief background check on Em’s past “verbal quarrels” and a majority of his opponents, well the rapping ones, haven’t been much of a threat. We have Ja Rule, Jermaine Dupri, Canibus and Benzino.

Lyrically, Canibus is the only one who poses the threat. Physically, well, I don’t think neither party (Em or the aforementioned artist) would take it that route.

Em’s lyrical track record speaks volumes, which is probably why a majority of hip hop’s elite wouldn’t attempt to tread those waters. But I’m curious- would Em? “We Made You,” Em’s first single from his new album, “Relapse,” serves as a playful and malicious jab towards the foul ups of pop culture’s head honchos. Of course we’ve been down this road with Marshall before, so in no way are we surprised….but where are the rappers?

Where’s Officer Ricky? Where’s Jeezy? Where’s T.I.? Where’s Jimmy? I mean it’s all fun and games right??? Anyway, here are 10 rappers Em PROBABLY wouldn’t throw a grape at. Agree? Disagree? Don’t care? Head to the comments section….IT’S THERE FOR A REASON!

10. Asher Roth- Would MJ talk that sh*t to Kobe? Ok then.

9. DMX- After what he’s been through, I wouldn’t even say “Hello” to Dark Man X.

8. The Game- Downing a bottle of Hennessy live onstage will distort your judgement in any given situation. And it’s PRETTY damn obvious Jayceon has a disdain for his own life, so I doubt he gives a FUDGE about Em’s.

7. Jadakiss- He dismantled Curtis Jackson single-handedly and carries a box cutter to meet and greets. Pshhhhh, play if you want, Marshall.

6. Remy Ma- She cut her best friend for $300, so she’ll probably cut her LYRICAL opponent for much less.

5. Young Buck- I don’t care if he cried over the phone with snot hanging out his coke-infested nose, that man shanked another human being at an awards ceremony.

4. Jay-Z- After what Em did to him on “Renegade,” Lucky Lefty is LOOKING for a reason to lyrically and physically “Lance ‘Un’ Rivera” Eminem.

3. T.I.- Cliff was caught with Weapons of Mass Destruction and only caught TWO months of jail time? Easy Marshall, as you can see, TIP governs himself.

2. Jim Jones- Something is seriously wrong with the boy from 5H. Personally, I don’t want any trouble with anyone who, A.) Made a career rhyming OFF beat, B.) Threatened to smack a reverend’s “Kufi” off his head and C.) Deemed his team of flunkys, “The Goonies.” THE HELL?

1. Young Jeezy- Well, because when I was at Def Jam interviewing Meth and Red last week, L.A. Reid walked in, looked at the issue of VIBE with Eminem on the cover, turned to me and said, “He WON’T say that to Young Jeezy” (insert L.A. Reid evil laughter).

Honorable Mention: Method Man & Redman, Bun B, The Clipse, Nas, Scarface, Ice Cube.

Sincerely

Low “I’m sure Em wouldn’t diss me…would he lol?” Key

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